Bats nest in the crack of the wall, on the upper right side
Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear I walk in town with my eyes glued to my shoes, ashamed for something I am no responsable for. I am the innocent victim of a printing mistake. The rural press is well known in France for this speciality. This summer, it fell on me.
During the first fortnight of August, the offices of the newspaper close down for the holidays. I have to find enough topics in advance to fill out my local pages for two issues, printed at the same time. I am rather proud to wrap it in a matter of hours. On top of it, on a café terrace, I meet a bats surveyor. Yes, a bats surveyor. The local environment league sponsors a programme to safeguard the bats, a vanishing specie. Local folks do not like bats and mass murder them. This surveyor of bats roams the country villages to index bats' nests and monitor bats' population over the years. That will be my central topic of the week! Environment is timeless. I photograph the bats' surveyor at work, searching the local medevial tower walls for nests.
Meanwhile, the editor in chief calls. He has been pressed for an article on the local art exhibition. The town celebrates the centenary of a minor but respected cubist painter with a retrospective in the medievial tower (the local monument). OK, i'll do it. I dutifully visit the exhibition in the medieval tower, interview the chairman of the painter's foundation and a couple of local cultural luminaries. I am not confortable with art reviews in general and least of all with cubists. In a matter of hours, I email my editor in chief the review, with a painting reproduction to illustrate the article. It pictures the town medevial tower, in cubist style.
Can you guess what happened ? No? The captions got mixed up. The cubist tower of the respected painter was printed with the caption of the bats story: usefull tips on how to find bats in old walls cracks. The way the museum's chairwoman looked at me changed for ever. She had to cover the lunatic caption with Tipex before photocopying the article for the local MP's press clippings. I don't even dare imagine what the "Friends of the painter" think of me. I did not call them to apologize (for what?). I just walk with my head down.